Image by Reece Ward

Our buddy Reece Ward, he of the fun and creative Star Wars shirts, is at it again. This time, he’s making sure we keep our colors from running, as it were.

Check out Reece’s shirt on StarWarsShop.com.

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GeekDad’s own Matt Blum is interviewed on 99.1 The Whale, in Binghamton, NY about his adventures in bacon!

You can download or listen to the interview here.

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The Karate Kid, Image by Sony Pictures

Before we get to the review I, as head of security for this blog, need to make a very important announcement: Piracy is illegal! We let you into this review with your cellphones, but if anyone pulls one out, even just to check the time, and I see the screen, I will kick you out of this story! I have night-vision goggles, so I’ll know!

Okay, sorry, had to get that out of the way. I mean, they made that announcement at the screening of the movie last night, so I figure it was so important I should repeat it here. Because shaking phone-camera pix of a movie screen will take food out of the mouths of Hollywood movie studio executives.

So, there’s a remake of the classic (well, classic to anyone who was going to movies in the ’80s) Karate Kid. The original starred Ralph Macchio and Pat Morita, in the uplifting tale of a New York kid moved to SoCal, where he immediately gets on the wrong side of a group of mean, karate students. Not only was it a popular movie that embedded itself in our cultural consciousness, it also turned a generation of kids onto martial arts.

So, how was the remake? Well, in classic GeekDad fashion, here are nine things we think you should know about the movie:

[But please, make sure you don't turn on your cellphone during this review, or you will be ejected!]

1. So, it’s The Karate Kid. Is there lots of good, juicy karate in the movie?

Well, actually, no. In reality, there is absolutely no karate in this movie. It’s all kung fu. If playing off the popularity of the original movie weren’t so important, we’d really ding them for not calling it “The Kung Fu Kid.” But we get it. It’s a movie about a kid learning a martial art. Karate, kung fu, whatever.

2. Okay, so not actually karate. What else is different about the film?

Not much. Well sure, it’s set in China instead of SoCal, meaning the alienation of young Dre (played by Will and Jada’s boy, Jaden Smith) is even more stark than the original. He’s not only an American in a radically different culture, he’s African American as well, and stands out like a sore thumb on a sore thumb — which is not good for kids at an age where they just want to fit in.

Otherwise, however, this Karate Kid is an almost beat-for-beat remake of the original, and comes in at almost the same duration (just over two hours). That might seem like a long movie, but it’s well-paced, and earns the development of Dre from a frightened stranger to a confident kid with serious kung fu skills.

3. What about Jackie? Do we get any classic Jackie moves?

Oh yeah. Not a lot, but there is one great Jackie scene where he takes down the bad kung fu gang of boys without actually hitting any of them. But the real joy of the movie is Jackie’s performance as a wounded man with a terrible burden slowly healed through helping someone else. He’s really, really good. I mean, has any other Jackie Chan ever made you cry? I mean, made you get something in your eye, which then waters uncontrollably? No, I think not.

4. Wax on, wax off. Paint the fence. Are they there?

Not exactly, but in spirit yes. And in a fun way that tackles both Dre’s early training and his bad ‘tween habit of leaving his stuff lying around everywhere. There is a good wink to the original “wax on” line about two-thirds of the way through the movie, though.

5. It’s a movie about kids fighting with kids. How rough is it?

I’m not going to lie to you, Marge, it gets a little tough. The bad kung fu kids and their master share the mantra “no mercy,” and punches are not pulled. Compared to the original (in my fuzzy memory), it seems a little rougher, but not radically so.

6. What about training montages? We must have our training montages!

Have no fear, there are two good training montages, one of which involving high-kicking on the Great Wall of China. You’ll be happy.

7. And Jaden Smith? Can he even carry Ralph Macchio’s water?

Jaden Smith is going to be a star. The kid’s got the chops (figuratively and literally), and considering the training he must have done for this film, I’m sure he’ll be making the Die Hard remake in a couple years.

8. How about pee breaks? When’s the best time?

Well, since you’ve seen the bones of this movie before, you could sneak out pretty much anytime and be able to pick up the story when you get back without much pain. But any point between where Dre starts training with Jackie and when they take a day off from training, and you’ll safely not miss anything important.

9. So, bottom line it for us, sensei!

The Karate Kid (2010) is a worthy remake/update of the classic Karate Kid (1984). Jackie Chan is a joy in a surprisingly moving role, and Jaden Smith makes you root for him. The setting is used to great thematic and visual effect, and while everyone knows perfectly well how the movie will end, the theater still erupted in cheers. My kids thought it was “awesome,” and my wife — well she actually said “it’s better than the original.” I’ll play it a little safer, and say it’s just as good, and a great family film in its own right.

Okay, now that the review is over, you’re welcome to take your cellphones out and turn them back on. Thanks for understanding. Remember: piracy is a crime! :p

Here are ten of my favorite Kermit newscaster videos, of ones available on YouTube (one before the jump, the rest after).

Dork Tower #794, by John Kovalic

Read all the Dork Towers that have run on GeekDad.

Find the Dork Tower archives, DT printed collections, more cool comics, awesome games and a whole lot more at the Dork Tower Website.

Tales2Go is an an app that delivers stories for your children straight to your phone. Nothing extraordinarily new about that, and the company knows it. They are pitching to the crowded app store market that this is quicker and easier than downloading and syncing stories via podcast or audio file. They are promoting the delivery system, but it is the content that most appeals.

What they should be doing is highlighting the select storytellers they have. They have got some great voices to go with their 900+ collection of stories. They have storytellers like Odds Bodkin, Len Cabral and and Dianne Ferlatte. These are great voices and people who really know how to make a story come to life, which is always my issue with audio books for kids. Too often the reading leaves a lot to be desired.

For geeks the collection includes a few interesting titles - Alice in Wonderland for older ones, Dinosaurs Never Say Please for younger ones and a heap of fables, mythology and generally texts out of copyright.

The issue is will you get your money worth for a $24.99 annual subscription and how often will new stories be added? Well, you are welcome to sign up to a 30 day trial and find out for yourself .

Wired: A great collection of good quality story tellers.
Tired: Is this really easier than syncing audio books? Surely the value here is the content, not the delivery mechanism…

I looked at the review copy I received with an eye to finding something new that might interest my kids.

Inside of "I Swear To Good You Are God At This"

I found a few possibilities. The entry on the Ambrose Collective, a group that specializes in mentoring students who want a career in the applied arts made me wish I lived in Michigan and could send my teenagers to one of their workshops.

I also liked the Do Good site, which showcases an iPhone app that urges people to do an act of kindness each day. My younger son was quite taken with the idea of suggesting his own “Do Good” idea.

And while it’s not an interactive site, I found Mysterious Letters fascinating. It’s a site whose creators are dedicated to writing to everyone in the world, one town at a time.

They first did it with Irish village of Cushendall and the next batch of hand-written letters went out in November 2009 to Polish Hill in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I’m hoping the idea might inspire my kids to put pen to paper, though likely they won’t write to a whole town. But a letter to their grandmother would be nice.

While I enjoyed paging through the book, I had to wonder why it would be necessary to put together a print project to publicize websites. My instinct is that this might not be as effective as a pure electronic creation. I asked Kevin Brown, the head of Holiday Matinee why he went with a physical book.

He said:

Going with a physical release was the intention from the start. While it’s true I’m obsessed with new media, there’s no denying I’m still very much attached to analog, physical products. From vinyl records, design/art/photography books to pop culture magazines-even with the rise of new technology, there’s something truly about holding, smelling and being able to run your fingers through something tangible. It’s a certain warmth that I like to think brings the content to life, especially the web-based features. Plus, I like the notion of flipping new media with something more traditional.

I can only hope that others are as keen on physical objects. I have a Sony eReader and I love its convenience. But, like Brown, I agree there’s nothing like a tangible object.

Over the past few weeks I have been reading the Percy Jackson books to my son. We started with The Lightning Thief, the first book in the series. He quickly became a fan. (Okay, I like reading them to him as much as he likes hearing them.) They are a worthy reading choice for those of you who have finished with the Harry Potter books.

[Spoiler Alert: I'm only going to mention things that I think are obvious from the trailers. Sorry if I get that wrong.]

Like Harry Potter, Percy Jackson is a misunderstood youth who does not realize his powers. It turns out the Percy is a hero: half-man and half-god. The gods of Olympus are still around. You just need to take the elevator in the Empire State Building to the 600th floor. Poseidon had an affair with Percy’s mother and is Percy’s absent father.

Will my kids like it?

“It was good, but a little scary and a little loud.” (The review from my young son.) When I looked around, all of the kids were enjoying the movie.

Will I like it?

When I was looking around at the kids, I noticed that all of the adults were also enjoying the movie. I liked it too. You definitely want to add the movie to your Netflix queue. It’s also worth seeing with your kids. I’m not sure the movie is worth the expense of a babysitter for a parents out night.

The special effects are great and the story is good enough to keep you interested. I was hoping it would do a better job of bringing the great characters of Greek mythology to the big screen. It’s much better than original 1981 Clash of the Titans remake with Sam Worthington as Perseus.

How PG is it?

My six-year old hid his eyes during the monster scenes. The encounter with Mrs. Dodds at the beginning of the movie is the scariest of the monster scenes. The Minotaur attack and Hades appearance in a campfire were also scary. The movie got progressively less scary for younger kids.

There is a fair amount of sword fighting and monster battles, but very little bloodshed. I didn’t notice any foul language. There is some mild sexual innuendo between Rosario Dawson as Persephone and Grover.

Do I need to read the book first?

The Percy Jackson stories are very accessible. If you haven’t read the books, the movie will certainly encourage you do so.

You also don’t need to know Greek mythology. Unfortunately, the movie downplays the underlying mythological stories.

How much does the movie differ from the book?

Chris Columbus was very true to the Harry Potter books when he directed the first two movies in the series. With The Lightning Thief he strays very far from the book. He omitted some semi-major characters, added a monster from the second book, made some significant changes to the storyline and made a few changes to the underlying Greek mythology.

Reading the book was much a much richer experience than watching the movie. It was great to see the transformation of Greek mythology to the modern age. The book was funnier and had some great lighthearted interactions that were missing from the movie.

Will the polytheism confuse my kids?

Some parents may be concerned that the concept of multiple gods might confuse their kids. I have been waiting for a question about which god is Jesus’ father. So far, it has not been asked. He just accepts the transfer of Greek mythology to the modern day and that the mythological gods are just really powerful characters.

Will my kids want to learn more about Greek Mythology?

One can only hope.

Is it as good as the Harry Potter movies?

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone set a high bar for bringing a widely read fantasy book to life. The Lightning Thief is good, but not as good as the first Harry Potter movie.

Is it just a Harry Potter knock-off?

The comparisons to Harry Potter are obvious. Each book takes place during a year in Percy’s life. The first two books take place during summer vacation. The third takes place during winter vacation. Like Harry, Percy was unaware of his origins and his powers. Percy has a group of friends (one male, one female) joining him on his quests. There is a prophecy involving Percy that may determine the fate of his new found world.

I found the modern interplay with Greek mythology to be really interesting. The book and the movie could have focused more on that interplay and created a more enjoyable story without adding the Harry Potter like themes. The movie downplays some of the Harry Potter concepts from the book.

Any good previews?

I leave that up to my son. The quotes are his.

• Alice in Wonderland - “Looks cool.”
• Cats and Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore - “That’s funny.”
• Despicable Me - “Ha, ha, ha, ha!” (It was the new minions trailer).
• Karate Kid - “Kapow.” (A remake with Jacki Chan as Mr. Miyagi)
• Diary of a Wimpy Kid - “So not happening.” (I don’t know what that means.)

Image courtesy Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation

For those of you following the podcast, I promised some time last year to do a YLOCWW of what might be my most controversial video to date: “Watership Down.” For those of you who aren’t Michael O’Donoghue fans, this animated movie may be a bit of a shock.  It’s based upon a political fable, written by Richard Adams, about a group of bunnies who are given a prophecy that their homeland is about to be destroyed, and thus must relocate to a new warren.  Along the way they are beset by numerous trials and tribulations, but are ultimately delivered unto the promised land.  Now, let’s break it down…

Sex

We’re talking about bunnies here.  British bunnies, no less.  No, as close as we get to sex, is a suggestion by one of the fascist Owsler rabbits that an Owsler-guard can have his share of the does (female rabbits).  This is as close as it gets.  Seriously, if your five year-old can divine the meaning there, then your “talk” with them is long overdue.

Horror

While there is a disturbing level of violence (see below) in Watership Down, there is little horror.  Probably the scariest part of the movie is when the rabbits come upon the first warren that they think may be their new permanent settlement.  The warren is populated entirely by old, stuffy rabbits.  There are no kits, and no does, but plenty of food mysteriously left for the rabbits by humans.  As it turns out the place is a trap to capture rabbits for food.  This scene is very spooky, and when Bigwig is caught in a snare, there is blood coming out of his mouth.  If your geekling is too young for blood, then they are definitely too young for Watership Down.

Values

Watership Down has a number of good values expressed in it.  The first is that the lead hero of the story, Hazel, succeeds through cleverness — not superior force.  He succeeds by being true to his nature.  He’s a rabbit, not a dog.  The second, and larger, point is that Watership Down is a diatribe against fascism and police states.  General Woundwort is the totalitarian dictator of Efrafa and tells everyone down to the last doe and kit, what to do and when to do it.

Violence

This is where Watership Down gets into some fairly sketchy territory for what is ostensibly a kids cartoon.  This is why I saved it for last.  The rabbits are violent with one another to the point of drawing blood, and even killing one another.  In addition, other animals get in on the rabbit slaying.

Conclusion

Watership Down is a questionable choice for a kids movie, and not at all for the very young.  My geek-pup first saw this when she was eight, and has loved it ever since.  It is probably one of her top three favorite movies of all time, and has never given her nightmares.  It is one of the few cartoons I like to watch with her, because it is more substantive than many more “traditional” cartoons.

[This post original ran in February, 2008]